The Northolme – Gainsborough Trinity

Gainsborough Trinity – 2

Colwyn Bay – 0

Football Conference North – 31^st March 2012

What….you didn’t believe Sunday’s post, did you? 🙂

A football blogger, in one of his other pursuits (the church) wrote recently “It has been proven recently that when man has nothing else for comfort, they get comfort from God.”. I am not the most religious person in the world, so can’t really get comfort from God. However I do get comfort from omens, omens that were most needed on the trip to Gainsborough.

In truth, Colwyn Bay have been frustratingly dismal recently. After an amazing January and a February that started promising but petered out, March has been abysmal, needing the Bay faithful nervously looking over their shoulders at the dreaded “R” word. At the time of writing, upgrading the ground for the Conference North level of football is looking promising, however the team isn’t quite yet mathematically safe. Barring a massive collapse and the substantial cushion beneath us deflating, we should be okay. However, one the former is occurring, and the latter, well, let’s just say we don’t want to rely on the latter.

However, we haven’t played badly. Solihull should’ve been a point bar an amazing strike (more of which in a later blog) and Corby was a frustrating 1-0 loss. Unfortunately, it’s the time of the year where moral defeats count for nothing, and you crave 91^st minute goals off the arse of the opposition centreback.

All in all, a trip to Gainsborough Trinity, who were pushing the playoffs, wasn’t exactly the most welcome. As such, I began looking for omens.

Gainsborough had picked up points liberally and were pushing the playoffs. The team, an ex league side, were dangerous opponents. Opponents vanquished at the reverse fixture early on in the season at the Bernabay.

That’s Omen 1.

I left my house and headed to Picadilly Station. I just missed my first train, a trip via Doncaster to Gainsborough, instead I had to get a train via Sheffield 40 minutes later. To pass the time, I headed into the amusement arcade at the station and off the princely sum of one English pound, I won £70 out of the fruit machine. If I ever “jack a fruitie” (to use insider terms for winning Jackpot on a Fruit Machine) on a Saturday, Colwyn Bay win (I refer you to Stalybridge Celtic).

Colwyn Bay struggled to defend corners.

That’s Omen 2.

I jumped on the train and got myself sat down next to some Oldham lads. The guys were off to watch OIdham play Notts County, and were in a similar situation to us – 10 points off the drop, mid table, with a handful of games to go. “You’ll be fine!”, they said with the kind of confidence you can say when you haven’t spent £70,000 and worked your hands to the bone building a ground to meet Conference North standards. I informed them that I had been to Oldham before, to watch the preseason friendly via Blackpool. I didn’t mention the fact my camera got confiscated.

Halfway through the journey, one of them spoke to another guy on the train, who perked up when I mentioned Stocksbridge Park Steels. The fans were Chorley fans, of which we shared stories about useless players we shared, and generally had a chat on how the season was going. They were ironically the same fans I chatted to on the way to Eastwood Town about 3 months ago. A game that we won.

That’s Omen 3.

After rushing to the final train, I arrived in Gainsborough, where I met up with the Bay contingency in a pub called the Elm Cottage. It was nice enough, the building was lovely, but there was an uneasy “non mathematically safe” air to the game today. An air that wasn’t going to change, we thought, at final whistle. Nevertheless, we shared some stories with the locals, including one who was scarily into architecture, who said that Gainsborough Trinity’s ground was one of the oldest, if not the oldest, in the country.

After a couple of pints we headed into the game. The ground was your typical Conference North ground, with plenty to it yet a little haphazard. I headed to the corner of the ground to the club shop (which was a portable building), before heading to get some food.

The food is worth a paragraph on its own. Although I’ve tasted better pies and better chips, they were easily the nicest whole plate of food I’ve had at a football ground. The pies were a work of art, large chunky steak pieces, perfectly cooked with just a little too much gravy, in a solid crust. The chips were proper thick cut potato chips, that were amazingly cooked. Comments on the curry sauce and the peas echoed this. Gainsborough Trinity may not have a lot, but their food is exemplary.

Allan Collins chased down every ball for Colwyn Bay

The kick off came (Gainsborough’s walk on music is “The Eye of the Tiger”), and although Colwyn Bay attacked early, Gainsborough took the lead after 5 minutes. Connor Roberts, who pulled off an amazing safe to keep the game level seconds before, pulled off a great stop to keep the game level from the resulting corner. However the ball was headed in by Luke Waterfall at the far post, and Gainsborough took the lead. Although Colwyn Bay pressed for an equaliser but never really threatened, and on 35 minutes, the seagulls conceded a free kick on the edge of the penalty box.  Luke Holden hit the bar with the shot, and the ball wasn’t cleared. Andrew Boyce scored a headed tap in to put the home side 2-0 up.

Half time came, and we experienced Gainsborough’s club house. It was nice enough, but it had the air of a clubhouse that would exist should there be an apocalypse, with large, school dinner tables in rows. Nevertheless, the beer was excellent, with a couple of great local brews. One of which, Titanic, I have been enjoying in Manchester recently.

The second half was a bit dull in truth. Colwyn Bay didn’t look like wanting to win, and Gainsborough seemed happy to rest on their laurels. Matty Hughes, who was rushed back for the game, was injured (which isn’t good for our run in), and Frank Sinclair got more than his fair share of light-hearted taunting because he is, well, Frank Sinclair, but beyond an amazing chance right at the death for Gainsborough to make it 3-0, there was nothing in the second half. Final score, Gainsborough 2-0 Colwyn Bay.

Results kind of went our way, but we could’ve used a win. With me, sat in a train as I write this, drinking extortionately Spitfire Ale bought from Sheffield train station, I realise something.

Omen’s are for losers.